We've turned in our application to Link Care in Fresno, California. The soonest we can get in is June 14th and they aren't sure about that. I'm feeling weaker as Jeff gets a little stronger. Odd how that is. New meds and commitment to exercise are helping him, at last.
Yesterday Jeff and I went out for some quiche at Cooper's Coffee (not the best place to talk as I can't hear over all the clatter of the baristas) but we did have a brief meaningful conversation about the impact of PTSD on our spirituality. There is loss even in that very core area of our lives where we are deeply wounded and challenged to believe there is God. Challenged to believe that he really cares. The only thing that keeps us connected is knowing he is present with us through it all. Like Jeff said, however, "We know the words which we have shared with others in their dark places." Numbness robs the words of their force and even of a sense of truth in them. I keep telling myself: This, too, shall pass. I am so very tired, though.
The VA Family Ed class seemed bleak this week as the facilitator said it is a travesty the VA cannot get Jeff into in-patient treatment when he is ready and willing to do so. The only suggestion was to call our congressman. Just can't seem to get up enough energy to do so.
